Angel Soft? My Ass...

Being a creature of habit I have purchased the same brand of terlet paper for years.  I don't know the brand but the package has a bunch of pink on it.  Not only is the packaging hella pretty but that sheesh is soft - just the way I like it.

The other day I went to my local Long's Drugs to buy terlet paper (along with tampons, Long's Drugs brand lube, douche and a #2 pencil).  My local Long's Drugs is wee - about the size of my foot.  OK - that's an exaggeration.  The store is larger than a woman's size 6.5 but you know what I mean...

Being a wee store they didn't have my pink packaging terlet paper so I bought what I thought would be a suitable substitute.  A number labeled "Angel Soft".  How could I resist?  I've never touched an angel but I suppose they're soft.  Couldn't wait to get home and try it out.  I imagined it would feel like wiping with a cloud.

Let me just say that if this is what angels feel like - get me some angel repellant.  Who allowed the company to use this name?  It's totally misleading - an outrage.  They should change the name of this terlet paper from "Angel Soft" to "Knuckle Sandwich Soft" - that's simply more honest.