Music is my king sized bed!
Friday, August 29, 2008
Wednesday, August 27, 2008
OMG - IAH!
Attack of the Crystal Gayles!
Tuesday, August 26, 2008
Friday, August 22, 2008
Is this IAH in ten years?
I love my kitties (shout out to Marvin and Shamus). But please don't let me turn into this woman. Please!
I mean - it's fine that I've taught Marvin to make my cocktails, right? And Shamus gives a divine pedicure. But this lady is totally over the top...
Ahhhh.....love to love you, Costco...
Costco atrocities:
- "LUV2COK" license plate spotted upon pulling into parking lot. We tried multiple iterations to try to discern what this meant and are quite confident it's a shortened version of "love to cock".
- Overfed "lady" (she was probably in her early 30s) in the parking lot wearing a half-shirt (with fully exposed belly) covered with a macrame shawl. Elsie thought that maybe she was pregnant. I know she's just overweight with no fashion sense.
- Gloria Vanderbilt jeans. What is this - 1983?! Sure - I rocked those bitches when I was a tween at the roller rink but, really...
- A man with an ill-fitting toupee (and he had used a liberal amount of pomade [perhaps in an attempt to make it look more "real"?])
- The scariest vendor rep on the face of the earth. She's hawking ECOS laundry detergent (which I've used and think it's awful). While I was pointing out this flawed detergent to Elsie the rep pounced upon us. When she opened her mouth I almost passed out. "Lady" appeared to have all her teeth but oddly they were all pointing in different directions. How does that happen?
Now - the trip wasn't a total loss. Dean got some cute outfits. Elsie and I were also impressed by the number of organic products available. But, whoa - if this is what goes on in and around Costco is it safe to return for an inexpensive bunch of bananas or a tetra pak of organic soup?
Labels:
cock,
Costco,
Dean,
Elsie,
Gloria Vanderbilt,
half-shirt,
teeth at war,
toupee
Crystal Gayle...again?!
Another day, another Crystal Gayle doppelganger...
I don't know what makes this story better - the fact that there's another "lady" sporting the classic CG 'do(n't) or the circumstances around the sighting. You be the judge...
Elsie, Dean and I were frantically driving through the streets of Oakland and Berkeley in search of this bike shop (see below). We pulled over to regroup (e.g., call the store for address and give Dean a bottle and cuddles [he was worn out from the trip to Costco {see above}]). While we've got a few minutes of downtime Elsie says "I think it's a good idea to start a Crystal Gayle hair website. What should we call it?". We're brainstorming ideas when this specimen walks past us. In classic IAH mode, I'm a total deer in headlights. I'm staring at her, mouth agape and shaking my head in horror. Thankfully Elsie was there. Now that she's a mom she has faster reflexes. She immediately snaps me out of my Crystal Gayle reverie with shouts of "Take a photo! Get out of the car! RUN!!!!". Next thing you know I'm running down the street to catch up with "lady". Thankfully there was a red light where she had to wait to cross the street or else I never would have captured this beauty.
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