I rock!

Last night was my second guitar lesson.  I learned four new chords.  G was a breeze.  C is kicking my rump.  I may need finger lengthening surgery to be able to play it (but that's not an unreasonable option).

Before you know it I'll be totally wailing on guitar.  My neighbors will be lulled to sleep every night by the dulcet tones of "Stairway to Heaven" and awakened to "Immigrant Song".  Mid-day will be all about Hank Williams, Dolly Parton, Willie Nelson and Kris Kristofferson.  And then I'll go on tour.  And make a billion dollars.  And design a clothing line.  And a line of eco-friendly cleaning products.  And my best friend will be Pat Benatar.  And we'll wear matching headbands.  And...I really need to master that C chord.

I heart you, Elephant Pharmacy!

If you haven't been to Elephant Pharmacy - what are you waiting for?  This place is the real deal.  Where else can you get prescriptions filled, purchase homeopathic allergy meds and take free yoga classes?  Oh - and sample organic lip gloss to boot...

seat belt cozies - the real crime in Oakland

Yesterday my pal Jemmy Pilsner and I had dinner at Lanesplitter Pizza (yums!).  En route to our destination (a mere 1.4 miles from my apartment) we saw not one but two(!) men driving while wearing seat belt cozies.  WHAT (said in Li'l John voice)?  

We shamelessly mocked the first guy (claiming it must have been a gift from his 14 year old girlfriend) but the second guy really threw us.  He looked like your average cracker (who wouldn't have a 14 year old girlfriend who gives cozies as gifts - or would he?).  So - what's the deal?  

Now - we've all heard the statistics about crime in Oakland.  But, come on - this is by far the most egregious crime being committed in the city of Oakland.  I'm going to start a neighborhood watch or a vigilante mob.  My goal:  make Oakland free of seat belt cozies.  

Say it with me "Cozy-free is the choice for me!".